Thursday, June 11, 2009

Obama Wags Finger at Naughty, Naughty Congress

Today an enraged Barack Obama repeatedly wagged his finger at Congressional leaders, taxing them with being "naughty, naughty congressmen" and demanding that they cease their free-spending ways. "Naughty, naughty Congress," said Obama, "you must stop running up deficits of the people's money. ...Where did you EVER get the idea?" In a later news conference, Obama repeated the theme, stating "I am SHOCKED, SHOCKED, to find deficit spending going on here."

Central to the administration's plan for dealing with the newly-discovered problem is a white-magic spell pronounced "Pay-go". According to administration economist Ijust Maekitup, "The phrase Paygo repeated at regular intervals will save-or-create over 5 trillion dollars of deficit savings over the coming four years." In response to a reporter's timid inquiry as to how the five trillion dollar estimate was derived, Maekitup explained "Our numbers estimate one trillion dollars of savings for each letter in the magic phrase, so Paygo with five letters gives you five trillion," adding that "If more savings are required we might consider going to a longer phrase, such as Abracadabra."

News services plan to adopt this new Obama The Deficit Cutter theme for their lead stories in the coming days. Said one prominent editor, "We were planning a weekend puff piece on the theme, Michelle Obama is Elegant & Cultured, Not Crass, Resentful & Nasty-Looking, but now it will be replaced by Obama The Deficit Cutter, which is clearly more believable."

(courtesy of Parody News Service)

Background: here and here. Thank you, Drudge Report!

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